


soft hearts, electric souls

by mackdizzy



Category: Homestuck
Genre: First Kiss, M/M, hurt comfort, no-Sgrub AU, oh my GOD amiright, solkat - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-01
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:54:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22515073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mackdizzy/pseuds/mackdizzy
Summary: if you're a lover, you should know / the lonely moments just get lonelier / the longer you're in lovethe first day, one night before the last.
Relationships: SolKat, Sollux Captor/Karkat Vantas
Comments: 2
Kudos: 42





	soft hearts, electric souls

**Author's Note:**

> Holy shit, It's NOT GRAVITY FALLS?
> 
> What it IS is an INCREDIBLY SLOPPY and VERY RUSHED birthday fic for a friend; however, despite all that, I'm still immensely proud I was able to muster something up for a different fandom--I really do aim to spice up my Ao3 with EVERYTHING I'm into, so even a sloppy start is a great start for me!
> 
> I fell back on my laurels with something I can churn out literally any time; No-Sgrub AU. Everything else is pretty self-explanatory. I have barely any muse for Karkat Vantas, but I love Solkat so much that I had to give it a try.
> 
> TW'S: Basically none. Impending doom for both characters, but nothing real and active.
> 
> [title and description from P!ATD's House Of Memories]

Sollux Captor would’ve liked to say the night he told Karkat was spent heroically; a cheap comment inserted over video games, a shrug of the shoulders, a glint in his eyes that would not be snuffed out by the empire. A battle he was charging into headfirst no matter the consequences, living in the moment, and all that jazz.

He would’ve liked to say that, but it would’ve been a lie.

Sollux Captor would’ve, at the very least, liked to say he was a good liar; that he was able to slip his hands under his ass soon enough that Karkat didn’t get to see them shake, that he could iron out his face, wear out the creases, smooth his laugh over at the edges. That even if that glint in his eyes wasn’t genuine, it would’ve at the very least been  _ there. _

That would also be a lie. 

The truth was this:

The truth was in the way even  _ he  _ could feel the static run down his arms when he flew the door open, using his powers because he felt too worn to use his arms. The empire didn’t care now--couldn’t get on him now for that. The truth was in the way he balled and unballed and reballed his hand around the letter in his clutch almost furiously as he crossed the room in heavy steps and practically threw himself onto Karkat’s couch. The truth was in the way they did  _ not  _ play video games that night, did not even think about it. The truth was in the way his mind swirled and bounced off the edges and the way he said “KK”, like they were children again, all crack-y and gross.

“What?” Karkat had previously been leaning against the counter, but he crossed to sit on the couch next to Sollux, sinking into the cushions a little. His voice held some hostility, but a generous amount of that  _ care  _ he tried to hide as well. “Are you gonna spill the beans and tell me what you had to trudge over here at almost-sunrise to tell me?”

“No. Read.” He shoved the letter over, wrinkled and greasy from his trembling hands. He wanted to say it was because of the anger and hostility worn into him by reading the words over and over again that he didn’t want to repeat them out loud, bitter, hostile, weary. That would also, however, have been a lie.

(The truth was he was too scared to let them pass his lips).

(If they passed his lips, it was real.)

Annoyingly enough, Karkat had always been a faster reader than he had. His eyes scanned the page in a matter of seconds, then did it a few more times for good measure. Karkat was  _ also  _ worse at hiding his emotions than he was (or maybe Karkat just didn’t want to--need to--like he did), and nothing stopped the way his eyes wet as his voice broke on the words. “No--No. No!” Karkat shouted in his frustration, ripping the letter in two on bold instinct. Sollux could get his ass busted for that, but he didn’t really care in the moment.

“Don’t tell me you didn’t see it coming.”

“They’re--they’re taking you? To be a battery? Just like that?”

“Just like that.”

“When...do you...when do you leave?”

“Sunday morning.” It was almost Saturday. “Today’s my second to last night. Ironic, right? Two days to spare.” He laughed, because it was ironic, but it was also indicative. They’d always been watching him, since he hatched with those brilliant eyes of red and blue. The fuckers probably did it on purpose.

“Sweet Jegus.” Karkat buried his head in his hands. “I feel like fucking screaming.”

“Do it, man. No-one’s stopping you.”

Karkat did scream then, and the screams soon turned to sobs. Teeth-clenched, open-mouthed, violent sobs, the kind he’d tucked into his arms to do when their Lusii had left (been killed). That had been a little over two sweeps ago. Damn. 

“God damnit.” Karkat mumbled, straightening up. “Am I--am I ever gonna see you again?”

He paused. Oh, how he would’ve loved to wax positive. He never did that, but for Karkat, he would’ve loved to. Sugarcoat things over. Talk about Karkat’s possible future as a threshcutioner. A possible dual--assignment. That the wills of captains were more varied than you might think. That they weren’t all bad, really, they’d make it out of here okay, they used ports nowadays. Another lie. Not the truth, which stated that he probably wouldn’t even remember Karkat once he was past basic, once Karkat had his life stripped from him on reaping day.

“No.”

The silence thickened in the air. Karkat nodded, for once at a loss for words. “I want you to--” Damnit, now  _ he  _ was getting mushy. “I want you to stay with me tomorrow. I have--a shit ton of people to say goodbye to. AA. TZ. FF. ED, even.” It probably wasn’t the place or the time for nicknames, but they came back to him now, like if he used everything that made him six again, he’d stay six forever. “But--I don’t want you to go until I have to. Yknow?”

“Yeah.”

He laughed, then, because he couldn’t think of anything else to do. It was a sick, cruel world. It was a world that had set him up with expectations from the day he was hatched, but then made him doubt them over and over again until they were staring him in the face. It was a sick, cruel planet, and he had two days left on it. 

“So, what are we doing tonight?”

“Same shit as always? Video games and your shit-awful cooking?”

“You’ve gotta be fucking--” Karkat buried his head in his hands again, and Sollux half-expected another scream, but he just sighed. “Last night together--”

“Second to last--”

“And you want to  _ pretend  _ like this shit  _ isn’t  _ happening  _ whatso-fucking-ever?” _

“Yeah.” He nodded, once. “Actually, I do. Are you making grubloaf or not?”

Karkat dragged himself off the couch with all the reluctance of a wriggler being sent to timeout and nodded once, shuffling to the mealblock. He, on the other hand, crawled to the TV set, starting up the newest edition of  _ Marrio Kart  _ and burying his chin in his hands. Then, he thought. He had a lot to think about. Once he was done thinking, he turned to look at Karkat, bringing the nutrition platters out. The soft, gentle curve of his hips. The bridge of his nose. His heavy eyelids. The way his hair wisped around his face that was splattered with freckles like the night sky. Every single detail he yearned to etch into his brain, keep it there forever. 

Karkat set the nutrition platters down and they half-ate, half-played. He swept the floor, and couldn’t help but wonder if Karkat was letting him win. After twenty-two rounds (he wouldn’t let them stop before), of which he’d won twenty-one (but fuck hemospectrum road, anyway), the sun could be felt behind the sealed-shut shades, and it was absolutely time for them to turn in for the day. 

“Do you wanna get in the trap first?” 

He nodded. “Best to savor the feeling one last time, yknow?” 

“You can waste my water tomorrow too, idiot.”

_ Idiot  _ was  _ not  _ usually the best Karkat came up with, nor was it ever even natural for him, but tonight had been a draining night, so he let it slide. He let it slide and he passed Karkat up the stairs in silence, used the trap in silence, stayed in silence until he re-entered the respiteblock and sat on the platform next to Karkat, an eyebrow raised. “Thought you’d be in coon by now.”

“You don’t wanna use it tonight?”

“‘S not big enough for two?”

Karkat raised an eyebrow then, folded his hands in his lap and re-folded them, turning a bright shade of red. He wondered aimlessly, his mind looping in circles, if that was because of his maturing age or because whatever he had just said had been  _ truly  _ embarrassing. It might’ve been, actually, but it hadn’t occurred to him in the moment. It had just sort of...come out. And now  _ he  _ was blushing, shaking his head. “Nevermind--”

“No!! No. Get in.” Karkat motioned, and he nodded, climbing in and leaning his head back on the rim. Karkat undressed and did the same. He wanted to apologize for the incoming nightmares ahead of time, but he wouldn’t. Many a time Karkat’s strong, chiseled hands had found his shoulders and shook him awake after even the sopor couldn’t keep him from screaming. Tonight would be no different--worse, even, maybe--but he didn’t feel the need to apologize. Apologies were probably completely behind them, actually, all being said and done.

Karkat’s thigh was against his own, curved, smooth as a wriggler’s spine. His eyes glistened with tears and something natural too, close up. The bridge of his nose came to a perfect point, and his star-like freckles were close enough to spot constellations in. There was gemini, tiny, just to the left of his lips. They were smooth and delicate and perfect, and---he’d never noticed that before. He’d never noticed how nice his lips were before. He wanted to bottle them up and keep them forever.

“Ok, you are practically burning holes in my skull right now, you goo-goo-eyed shit infant.”

Sollux blinked in surprise, scooching back. “Jeez, okay. Sorry.”

And then Karkat kissed him.

And then Karkat kissed him, and it was nothing like he ever would’ve imagined. It yanked the rug out from underneath him faster than he knew what to do with, and he made a noise against Karkat’s lips--Karkat made a noise back, soft and wanton and desperate. Karkat’s freckles were close enough to count, now, if he wanted to open his eyes, but he didn’t. He kept them close and felt instead, felt the sugar-sweet taste of Karkat’s lips on his own and the gentle curve of his hips as his fingers trailed up and down. 

They kissed for twenty-two seconds, but unlike the rounds of Marrio Kart earlier, nobody had to win. Another time, another place, more days after, they might have pailed. They didn’t pail, though, they just kissed for twenty-two seconds, until he couldn’t hold his breath any longer between the cheaters he was taking in between their lips, and he pulled back with a gasp. He had traced a bit of sopor up Karkat’s hip, and he wiped it off, and Sollux went yellow. That was gross, he shouldn’t have done that; why was he focusing on that? He’d just kissed Karkat Vantas.

_ He’d just kissed Karkat Vantas. _

“Oh--my God.” Karkat panted, and then he laughed. The laugh sliced the air, the current air, stifling and hot in this part of the city, and the air of the day, cold and depressing. It sliced through them both and sent them somewhere just right. “I should’ve--fuck---why didn’t I do that sooner?” 

“Dunno.” Something about this felt wrong. Really wrong. Like that kiss was his pushover into oblivion, and each one to follow would send him deeper and deeper. “KK, we can’t--we can’t--- _ start  _ anything, I’m leaving tomorrow. Leaving leaving. Leaving for  _ good.”  _

Karkat crossed his arms across his chest. “It was a goodbye kiss, okay? That’s all.”

His voice was absurdly quiet. “Don’t get sappy on me, KK.”

“No. Yeah. Totally.” Karkat cleared his throat awkwardly and then curled himself up, like this conversation was totally over. “Goodday, Sollux.” And then he moved in close, wrapping himself as tight around the troll who had saved his life too late as he could, and putting his head on his shoulder. He realized that this would mean he would probably be screaming right into his ear (and he did, as the hours of the day wore on), but…it would be okay. (It was okay.)

The evening moons rose with all the grogginess of the night after a first-time. Sollux gazed at the ceiling and saw stars, shutting his eyes tight with a soft groan. “Last day, KK.” He muttered impatiently as Karkat pulled himself out of the sopor too.

“And yet you’re still sitting on your ass. Surprising with the amount of goodbyes you have to do, nookwhif.”

That was as good an incentive as any for him to climb out of the coon and stretch both lanky arms above his head. Karkat followed soon after, resting his head on his shoulder. They swayed, for a moment, Sollux bowed over because that was the only way Karkat could reach, like this really was an evening-after. “You gonna give goodbye kisses to everyone?”

He laughed at that. “What, and taste ED’s fish-breath? Never in a million years.”

Karkat returned the laugh, soft and gentle, and that could’ve been that, but as he traced the divots in Karkat’s back with his fingernails, little curves and edges he had memorized, he decided he wasn’t done. “It didn’t have to be a goodbye kiss.”

“Don’t  _ you  _ get mushy on  _ me,  _ Captor. You and I know just as well that we’re never gonna see eachother again.”

“No.” He pulled back and shook his head. “No, I--I can’t. We’ll work for it. I’ll keep in touch. I  _ will.  _ You must be out of your pan if you think I can’t hack a vehicular mainframe.”

“You missed the part where they’re going to fucking  _ cull  _ me, Captor. I can’t hide this shit-ass color forever!”

“They’ll cull me too, eventually. They’re gonna cull all of us, KK. Worth a shot, right?”

“Worth a shot.” Karkat muttered, pursing his beautiful, soft, silky lips.

And because it was worth a shot, Sollux did touch those beautiful lips with his own again, and he refused to think of the stars outside the helmsblock when the only stars he needed to see he kept his eyes open to count.

**Author's Note:**

> I understand that you guys reading might not be my usual audience due to a fandom switch, but as always, if you enjoy I'd really appreciate a COMMENT!! They absolutely make my day.
> 
> (And if you ARE part of my usual audience, Forduary is coming very, very soon!)


End file.
